Let your spouse hear you say something good about him or her to someone else. It's sort of a thrill to hear yourself bragged on, and who doesn't need an occasional pat on the back? My gram always said it's better to laugh than to cry. If you can look at the ridiculousness of the moment instead of freaking out every time something goes awry whether it's lost luggage, flooded basements, or clogged sinks!
Know when to take a break and visit with friends or nurture your own interests.source url
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Because, yeah, sometimes we all do get on each other's nerves. Absence can make the heart grow fonder and reset the ticker on your patience. It's not the most uplifting experience to try to talk to you partner when he's surfing the web or texting. Establish a tech-free zone or time when you interact with each other and do real things in the real world: Go watch a sunset. Listen to the birds sing. Take a walk. Do anything together but stare at your phones.
Not all the time. But occasionally let the other person choose an activity or movie, even if it's one you don't particularly enjoy. There's comfort in the familiar, but there's a sense of excitement in finding new hobbies and activities to share. Take a day trip to place you've never visited. Sign up for salsa lessons. Try a restaurant on the other side of town. It's human nature to want to strike back when the other person is being ugly to you. But it's okay to be kind instead of being right. Of course, you won't always be able to take the high ground hello to my hotheaded temper!
And it often diffuses the situation. A good annual physical. The fact that it's finally Friday.
Go out and regularly celebrate the life you've made together. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. The 10 Smartest Cat Breeds. When Tashi tells the story of how they got to the point of diagnosis and surgery, he sits back and lets her talk. A gentle guy with a dry wit, he doesn't mind letting his wife take the lead. But after his brain tumor was discovered, Kevin's actions during the summer and fall of suddenly made sense to Tashi and his parents. And not just his erratic behavior, but physical symptoms, too — things that seemed unimportant or unrelated at the time but, in retrospect, seem about as obvious as a sign with giant flashing lights.
That summer, Kevin often complained of feeling dehydrated, and said that the light hurt his eyes. His mother, Marie Franke, remembers Kevin telling her about it on the phone, and thinking it was just a matter of adjusting to the desert. Sure, Kevin had always loved the Arizona heat, but it's one thing to pass through on vacation, as Kevin had as a kid. It's another thing to live in it, she reasoned. And Kevin had insisted that he was having some sort of low-grade seizures down his right side. But his therapist had told him not to worry.
They were merely full-body panic attacks. She suggested antidepressants. Kevin really didn't want that. Kevin had grown up in the small bedroom community of Hercules, California, in the East Bay area. In high school, he hung out mainly with one close group of friends, his mother recalls, and was chiefly involved with the school's Celtic Club.
It was in college that Kevin really blossomed. He lived at home and signed up for classes at a community college in California. There, he became something of a big man on campus, acting in plays, getting involved with the Student Senate, and excelling at speech and debate. He'd always wanted to be an architect, and so after he transferred to ASU, he majored in design studies. He was into steampunk, the movement that combines Victoriana with science fiction, and he had this idea that he could become a steampunk architect. Kevin marched to his own drummer.
Eva Wingren had been dating Kevin, but it wasn't serious or even exclusive. And so when Tashi invited some friends over to a watch a movie, Wingren invited Kevin to come, too. The only problem? Wingren promptly forgot about the invitation and made other plans. When Kevin showed up anyway, he bonded with Tashi over a love of cult TV shows. But nothing happened that night. It was only later, when they started talking online, that they both realized they were smitten. The problem, potentially, was the friend who'd introduced them. Wingren and Kevin had been dating, after all, and Wingren was Tashi's friend.
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They wanted to come clean, but Wingren was out of the country for the next eight days. What to do? But when Wingren returned to Phoenix, she gave her blessing without hesitation. After that, Kevin and Tashi's relationship was on warp speed. Within two months, they were already talking marriage. Ten months after meeting, they eloped.
- Shadow Tales.
- Netherhall Gardens!
- Optimism and the ambiguous ending of Sister Carrie.
He was She was just They said their vows in a lovely park, on a glorious March day. She wore a scarlet dress — a long, strapless number that made her look like a medieval princess — and carried a bouquet of brilliant blue irises. He wore a kilt. The wedding was so quick that they opted against telling their families. That reaction didn't give them much hope that their quick elopement would be welcomed with enthusiasm. Why not give their parents time to come around?
Their friends, though, were all for it. But, by the time of the wedding in Vegas, Wingren was on board: "They'd made a believer out of me. And that's why the events of the spring and summer of were so bizarre. Everyone knew Kevin and Tashi were great together — but suddenly, they weren't great at all.
Kevin was lethargic and unhappy. Only one semester away from getting his degree from ASU, he dropped out. Tashi took to scribbling in her diaries. This is not the man I fell in love with. That week, Kevin started a new job. After months of virtual unemployment — he'd briefly held a job working nights at Circle K and, even more briefly, worked for the Census — he landed a gig selling auto glass door-to-door.
It wasn't a great job by any means, but Kevin was out of options. And Tashi just wanted him off the couch, doing something. He made it through his first day. But on the morning of the second, Tashi got a text message from Kevin at work. He was supposed to report for duty at 10 a. Instead, he wrote, "I'm not feeling good.
I had to go back home. I'm feeling too ill. You need to man up and get over it! Sure enough, that evening, when Tashi came home from work, there was Kevin, back on the couch. He said yes. Oh, yes, Kevin replied. He'd done that, too. She called her best friend in tears. Tashi spent the night at her friend's house, pondering how things had gone so horribly wrong. She returned home the next day.
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Her 23rd birthday was that Monday, and she didn't want to be a year-old divorcee. But what choice did she have? And what was wrong with Kevin? Before they headed over, Kevin volunteered to get takeout from Baja Fresh. He'd been complaining of a headache, but otherwise seemed okay, so Tashi gave him her order. It should have been a short walk from the couple's Tempe townhome.
He should have been back in 20 minutes, tops. He said he lives here. He couldn't explain his menu choices, either. So Kevin went to bed, and Tashi went to her party with a heavy heart. It was a mistake. All she could think about was Kevin. Something's not right. Tashi found him on the bathroom floor — in a fetal position in a pool of urine.
He was hitting the back of his head, over and over, against the bathtub. The other stared at her. Frantically, Tashi called her mother, who was only a few blocks away. They loaded Kevin in the car — he was still mostly incoherent — and raced to St. Luke's Hospital, just a few blocks away.
Later that night, the physician on duty summoned Tashi and asked her to sit down. He told her that Kevin had a "mass" on his brain, and that it was around eight centimeters. He didn't know if it was tissue, blood, or a tumor.
They needed to send him to Barrow Neurological Institute at St. Joseph's Hospital. When Kevin arrived at Barrow at 1 a. And it was there that morning that everything began to sink in. Kevin's odd behavior, depression, lethargy, and even his "panic attacks" weren't the signs of a nervous breakdown.
And they didn't indicate that Tashi had married the wrong man. They were something physical. It was so weird sitting there in the hospital that morning, trying to fill out the requisite stacks of paperwork, trying to comprehend that this was their new reality. By the time of Kevin's collapse that Sunday, Kevin and Tashi still hadn't gotten around to telling their parents that they were married. The Pratts had met Tashi the previous Thanksgiving at their home in California, and liked her.
That Sunday, Tashi had called Kevin's mom even before arriving at the emergency room. Something was seriously wrong, she explained. Kevin's parents needed to get to Phoenix as soon as possible. Kevin's mom got on a flight at six the next morning. His dad, Chuck Pratt, found someone to take care of the house and watch the dog, then hopped in his car and raced southwest.
Although the drive is supposed to take 14 hours, Pratt did it in Originally, the surgery was scheduled for that Thursday. But by the time his father arrived Monday night, doctors had grown concerned enough to put Kevin on the fast track. They announced that surgery was scheduled for Tuesday morning. By this point, Kevin had at least stabilized, to the point where Franke and Pratt wondered whether there had been a mix-up.
It was an awkward scene, to say the least. But in retrospect, perhaps the timing wasn't all that bad. Within six months they marry in the Mormon Temple, sealing their partnership for time and all eternity. Six years later, five young kids and a growing business are putting their relationship under pressure.
Then, things come to a head in a violent encounter that blows their seemingly perfect marriage apart in an instant. They meet online, create a blended family and appear to have it all. Suddenly the illusion of a happy marriage is torn apart forever. They have so much in common that friends and family are convinced they've finally found their soulmates.
However, after suffering a series of misfortunes that put their marriage under enormous pressure, their home becomes a tomb, and their picturesque romance crumbles beyond repair. Mark Wangler and his wife Kathy appear to be living the middle-class dream: a year marriage, two sons, financial security, and a strong faith.
But when, a operator in Lima, OH, receives a frantic call from the Wangler household, what at first seems like a tragic accident is later uncovered to be a desperate end to a marriage riddled with secrets, lies and religious fanaticism.
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